The story of your boss reminds me of a conflict I had with my journalism professor back in college. He was loud and gruff, and more than once ridiculed me in front of the whole class. One day I dropped by his office to let him know I wasn’t going to be in class, because I had to cover a congressional hearing for my part-time job. Talk about a classroom — he should have been thrilled, right? Instead he threw me out of his office. Finally, I’d had enough and wrote him a rather nasty note.

Well, then what do you think happened? I got a sincere, unqualified apology, and he was sweet as pie to me ever after. It taught me that there are people who respect you only if you stand up to them. Sounds like your boss is among them.

Good for you for taking the risk!

I thought I had something like a power struggle with a superior, recently, and felt sad about it. I needed some understanding due to the fact that we were displaced from our home, and she was not so understanding, making it clear that my needs impacted her severely. I’m sure they may have, but I gave her as much notice as I could of possible absence. Emergencies happen. If I had magical powers, I’d have brought things back to normal with a swirl of a wand and a zap. But I didn’t and don’t.

And after a while, I realized that I didn’t need that crap. That kind of pressure and guilt. I remembered my power. If she didn’t understand, after all I’ve done for her for years, so be it. I’d move on. I mean, I have another part-time job and a couple of gigs. I didn’t need the emotional turmoil. I’d already tried explaining what was happening in our home, and she chose to be selfish. So I just didn’t communicate with her for a couple of days. I stepped away from the situation, which I believe freaked her out.

I think she understands our situation, now, because she was willing to accommodate me a tiny bit after I stopped talking to her.

Why did I have to feel like sh*t? Because someone else said so? I didn’t deserve it, you know? Had more than enough on our plates.

You’re 100% accurate on that healthy ego statement!