As many of you know, next Wednesday’s lunar eclipse falls exactly on my Sun at 13 degrees Aquarius. Being an astrologer doesn’t ease the jitters. I have to tell you, I’m very anxious.
When I counsel clients, I ask whether they can recall what happened at the last eclipse in whatever position we’re concerned about. Eclipse cycles run every 19 years, so in my case and for anyone who has personal planets near this degree of Aquarius and Leo, we want to look at significant events around Aug. 5, 1990.
I was in a committed relationship that year with the man I considered the love of my life. We were both reporters in Washington, D.C., and were rubbing elbows with high-level government officials. In June, his father died unexpectedly of a heart attack. His mother was dying of cancer and had been at home, with his father as her primary caretaker. His death threw everything into turmoil, and we left our jobs and moved to the West Coast.
His mother died two months later. For the better part of a year afterward, we were both in shock and totally disoriented. Finding work was hard, and we made ends meet largely with the help of long-time friends and neighbors of his parents. My ex grew up there, so he was at least on his home turf. I was completely out of my element, and after a “power career” was stunned to find my worth measured by how well I cooked, kept house, and hunted for bargains.
All of the hardship notwithstanding, moving to California changed my life for the better in ways I would not understand until several years later. If there’s a moral to the story, that’s probably it. We have to take it on faith that we’re heading in the right direction, and if we insist on going down the wrong road come hell or high water, course correction typically is very painful.
“How painful?” is the question I’m asking myself now. In scientific research, there’s a test called the LD-50, used to determine the level of toxicity required to kill half the test subjects, usually rats or mice. I’ve often joked about being a guinea pig in the cosmic lab, and in these last few days before another critical eclipse, I’m wondering whether the dose of life will be lethal or whether, once again, I’ll manage to live through it.
It’s said that knowledge is power, but knowledge is only half the equation. For it to be any good, you have to know how to apply it. That’s why astrology is a lifelong study. No matter how good we get, there’s always more to know. It’s also pretty much a given that we are too close to our own issues to be objective.
Before I end, I’d just like to thank you all again for being a part of our fledgling community and for sharing your stories. I wish I could share more with you about what’s happening for me, but I am not able at this time, and I can’t even tell you why not. And no, I am not having a sign-change operation to turn me into a Scorpio!
Much love and courage to all,
Pat
Image: The road to Los Glaciares National Park in Argentina. Photo by Natacha Pisarenko for The Associated Press, 2009.
RealAstrologers 
Hi Pat,
I understand your writing on the 19 year cycle. I was sitting here thinking earlier that I have never noticed such a profound correlation as with this one – or maybe I am just trying to be more aware. In 1990, my whole family unit fractured in that my younger sister who had been adored all her life, got pregnant. She was only 18 at the time. Home life became a nightmare and it hadn’t been great prior to that. The ramifications are still there to this day. As a result, I “escaped” home and went to live with a guy who would eventually become my husband and six years of emotional cruelty later, got divorced. That year affected my whole life and still does.
Now, the cracks are starting to appear again with more sisterly drama not to mention my mother and everyone else in the pot – and I feel like selling up and moving anywhere just to get some peace, only this time there is no easy escape, and I need to resolve it all now but don’t know how. Since my dad passed away two years ago, for some reason all family problems fall to me and I’m exhausted from it mentally and spiritually, but guilt keeps me entwined. The coming eclipse has me very nervous. I’m not sure if the awareness is a good thing but on some level it helps otherwise I think I would break.
Here’s hoping for a kindly turning point. We all need it.
All the best,
Deirdre
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Sorry, should have added, my moon is in the sign of Aquarius, my mother’s moon also and my sister is a Leo sun, Taurus moon. Drama and mental exhaustion all round.
Deirdre
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Hi Pat,
I’ve recently been trying to convince myself that catastrophes are actually opportunities, as the Chinese character would have you believe. Having the foresight to realize that a major change could actually be for the better at some point takes a lot, but it helps add some imaginary perspective.
I hope whatever changes for you isn’t TOO catastrophic- maybe it might even be a load off, fingers crossed.
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Hello,
My moon is 14 aqu so I’m waiting something to happen as it has been very boring this whole year.
In 1990 I was trying to live in this “city” that I now live permanently. Soon after I was shacked for the first and last time in my life. I was working in a very boring job with inputting book orders. It was so boring I thought I will fall asleep there. They might have already deciced that they want this other person to do the job as this other woman came to me jumping with joy. So maybe not all my fault. Anyway for years after that I tried to avoid that kind of work!
it’s just too boring for me.
Today I’m once again unemployed. So I don’t know if I learnt my lesson at all?
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Hi Pat,
I didn’t realise when the last series of eclipses on the Aqu/Leo axis were until I read your post. Wow, that was the year from summer 90 to summer 91 that I went through 3 redundancies. And for the first time was told that I was too old at 31/32 to get another job in my field – computer software. Then 10 months out of work which I used to research and set up my own business. A complete change of direction, back into the food industry just as I seem to be doing now. Coming almost full circle as food was my first career so this is the 3rd time.
This has now gone spooky as my first career in food had it’s roots around 19 years before that when I first learned how to cook at home and then school before leaving and training as a chef. I’ve always said that I started at the age of 12 (38 years ago) cooking the evening meal cos my parents ran their own business and that was the age they trusted me to prepare and cook on my own.
So where will this return to food take me this time…..
I’ll be thinking of you my Astro Twin. Well in my dreams as the eclipse hits just before 2am here in the UK.
Rossa
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In 1990, I was 11 (LOL) and after much Elementary school grade mediocrity (“Satisfactory” was my middle name), I finally achieved an excellent mark in a Junior High school entrance exam. I shocked my teacher (in a good way) and was up for a fantastic Math/Science program in a local public school.
Sure enough, as luck would have it, my older brother made it clear that a public middle school was “dangerous”, etc. (For gosh sakes, I didn’t even begin to resemble a girl until I was seventeen!) So my dad wound up placing me in a cheap private school just a block away. I say “cheap” because we lived in the inner-city so tuition was way, way cheaper than the fancier institutions in New York.
Yup. Bye-bye free and fabulous Math/Science Program. That “dangerous” crap broke my 11-year-old heart. And worse, a 2-year private education made me ineligible for enrollment at great public High schools!
For me, this time may mean that I should think carefully before making certain commitments. Which is funny because I’m considering doing some volunteer work and two avenues have been calling out to me. Guess it has to be a fair decision where I can call some shots because sometimes we can become vacuumed by the demand of helping others and we lose sight of ourselves and our needs.
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