Ask Real Astrologers: Why Does This Relationship Feel Fated?

This week’s question comes from Maya in New York:

I’m curious to know if there’s an important significance to having one person’s first house fall in the other person’s seventh and vice versa? My Ascendant falls in my boyfriend’s seventh house (conjunct his Saturn). While the degree of his Ascendant actually falls in my sixth house, the degree of my Descendant is intercepted in his first house. I don’t know what this means, but it seems like this should be significant. Our relationship feels highly “fated” to me.

Libra ponders . . .

Neith’s response:

Maya, the synastry aspects most associated with the feeling a relationship is “fated to be” are conjunctions involving the Saturn, Moon’s Nodes, and the Vertex. My personal preference is to keep the orbs small for all three of these – only two to three degrees as a general rule. These aspects usually ask us to pay attention and learn some things about ourselves via the relationship.

We are familiar with Saturn’s lessons of taking responsibility, being reliable, etc. Often, Saturn in synastry will bring us face to face with our insecurities, asking us to deal with them. As I’ve said before, hard aspects to Saturn are very common in lasting partnerships.

The Moon’s Nodes and the Vertex in synastry inform us of a potentially transformative interaction. Frequently, partners with synastry aspects to these points comment that they feel a sense of recognition and familiarity. Something else that can come into play is a deepening feeling of obligation over time, particularly if one person does all the giving, receiving little in return.

It’s also very common to see a combination of sweet and sour aspects in synastry – lovely Mars-Venus aspects along with kisses from Jupiter to sweeten the deal and make us want to stay around, backed up with the “fated” aspects. Other factors in our natal charts and in the synastry can help us determine our tolerance for accelerated personal growth. There is a very good reason Saturn is exalted in Libra, the sign of relating to others, because there is no better way to learn and grow than through actively participating in a long-term, committed partnership.

Good luck with this one, Maya!

Aquarius expounds . . .

Pat’s response:

Maya, this is a great question. You are right to suspect that flipped Ascendants and Descendants are significant in synastry charts. Alone, this isn’t enough to indicate an enduring relationship or a karmic connection, but if other aspects support it, it is certainly a major source of attraction. There’s a sort of mirroring effect, and often we look for partners that mirror who we are.

Technically, you and your boyfriend do not have flipped Ascendants and Descendants, because, as you note, his Ascendant and Descendant fall in your sixth and twelfth houses, respectively. But your Ascendant and Descendant do fall in his seventh and first houses, and this is not a bad aspect to have, either.

The “Big Three” markers in any birth chart are the Sun, Ascendant, and Moon. When any of these are in a partner’s first or seventh houses, you feel a connection, and these configurations often are present in the synastry charts of committed couples as well as in the charts of long-term friends. As I mentioned above, there must also be other factors present in the synastry chart to indicate a strong romantic relationship.

Wishing you both much love and courage, and thanks for writing.

Got a quick question? Click here to contact Ask Real Astrologers. We are getting some really great questions but unfortunately can’t use many of them, as they are missing information. If you’d like us to consider your question for this column, you must include your day, month (spelled out), year, and place of birth, and time if you know it. If you don’t, indicate “time unknown.” Also, we must have your current location. This is not optional. Thanks!

Advertisements