I broke up with my friend last autumn. I am trying so hard to be with him again but he is so cold and distant. Please, just tell me, is there a chance for us?
Elena, your words could have been written by any one of millions of women around the world. I have been among you, and my heart breaks for us all.
I have been writing about this topic for years and see this situation as an indication of a fundamental wound on our planet. Many of us are trying to heal now, just when planetary energies are shifting to bring everything and everyone back into alignment. That is the good news. The bad news is that we have to go through this painful situation and suffer as a perquisite to healing. So many people I know are going through exactly what you describe.
To put it another way, our individual suffering is mirrored in the collective and vice versa.
As to your particular situation, you’ve been affected very heavily by Mars in Leo. He has been in your first house for an extended stay, and he has crossed over your natal Sun and Mars twice already — once forward and once retrograde — and now he’s about to cross them for a third and final time. In last week’s column, I addressed some of the effects of Mars retrograde on the Sun. There’s a major difference, however, in that you’ve got Mars going through your first house, and he’s also opposite your seventh-house Moon, which can make you more emotional than usual.
Moreover, both you and your friend have a lot of fixed energy in your chart (the fixed signs are Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, and Aquarius). In fact, it’s quite interesting to note that you both were born near a Full Moon — you, with Sun in Leo and Moon in Aquarius, and your friend with Sun in Taurus and Moon in Scorpio.
Although you may have generated a lot of passion and heat in the beginning, you need to know that a long-term relationship with this person would entail ongoing conflict. It’s not impossible to make it work, but you would have to be very committed to each other, to your own personal growth, and to learning how to communicate without hurting each other. That may be the karmic lesson you need to learn, but I believe that you would eventually be happier with a relationship that isn’t so taxing and that allows your Leo personality to shine.
Thank you for writing, Elena. I really do feel your pain and hope that you soon will find peace for your troubled heart and soul.
For anyone who is interested, I do synastry readings, with a special gift for finding your karmic connections. I should warn you, though, that karmic connections aren’t always easy, nor do they necessarily mean that you were made for each other for all time. Many people I know are working through karmic relationships right now and are enduring a lot of pain in the process. What I can do for you is to help you identify the issue you are working on so that you can focus on that and get through your lesson as efficiently as possible.
Got a quick question? Click here to contact Ask Real Astrologers. You must use this form to contact me, or I won’t get your question. Be sure to fill out all the fields, and please spell out the month of your birthday. If you don’t know your time of birth, indicate “time unknown.” You can also use the drop-down menu above under “About Us” to get to the question form. THANKS!