Many times we need to choose what the nature of a relationship will be. Will we be friends or lovers?
When the outer planets are dominant in a compatibility chart, we often are drawn into a relationship despite our best intentions. I recently received an email from a young woman asking about her troublesome relationship with a young man, and in the process of looking at their synastry chart, I realized she may have been overwhelmed by the undertows created by the outer planets.
In their natal charts, they both have Moon in Libra and Mercury in Scorpio, indicating emotional and mental compatibility. However, her Sun in Capricorn is square his Libra Moon, even though his Sagittarius Sun is sextile her Moon in Libra. In most instances, a Sun-Moon square creates the possibility of misunderstandings and makes it difficult to sustain an intimate relationship. Nonetheless, this is pretty darn good chemistry.
Pluto’s influence is very evident, with his Mars-Pluto square and her Mars conjunct Pluto in Scorpio. It’s like they both have Mars in Scorpio on steroids. Both have Moon-Pluto natal aspects, so finding perspective in emotional matters is challenging, to say the least. Pluto and the sign her rules, Scorpio, both have obsessive qualities. Pluto’s role in both natal charts says they are both intense and possibly obsessive.
However, Neptune is also prominent in both charts. Neptune is conjunct her Sun-Venus, and he has also has Venus, Mercury, and Neptune conjunct in Sagittarius. In their synastry, his Sagittarius stellium conjoins her Mercury, a combination just about guaranteed to create a lot of empathy. It also indicates a possible psychic connection. The problem here, though, is that confusion can arise as a result. Venus-Neptune aspects make it difficult to sort romantic expectations from reality, too.
Just to make things more interesting, her Uranus conjoins his Sagittarius Sun – always good for instant attraction. A couple of wide Venus-Uranus synastry aspects add to the possibility of things heating up quickly and cooling down just as fast. The one planet not strongly represented in their synastry is Saturn. Saturn can help us stay grounded and practical – both necessary for durability.
As is also quite common with outer planet influences in synastry, the circumstances surrounding this relationship make being together as a couple difficult to bring about. To her credit, this woman understands what is at stake and is doing her best to detach from the relationship in order to preserve her sanity.
As an astrologer looking at their charts, I can see both the carrot (all the personal planet conjunctions for comfort and mutual understanding) and the trap (the outer planet synastry aspects), so the fact this relationship developed is not at all surprising. When someone has Libra rising and a Moon in Libra conjunct the Ascendant as well, learning life’s lessons through the vehicle of relationships is a given.
As to how to deal with this, I recommend getting a copy of Donna Cunningham’s book, Healing Pluto Problems. Donna believes those of us with powerful Pluto signatures in our charts can heal ourselves, and I can affirm that having done it. I send many blessings and lots and lots of good wishes flowing out to this young woman. Have courage; you can succeed.
posted by Neith . . .
RealAstrologers 
I think I have been going through a pluto obsession for the past year almost. It’s unlike nothing I’ve had to deal with before. I only know the person casually but cannot get them out of my head + weird happenings and bumping into them in the strangest places. Nothing has come of it because it seems to me that we are both profoundly uncomfortable with the energy between us but I am also wondering if I’m delusional…
I don’t have his time of birth but from what I can tell, we have pluto conj. pluto, pluto conj. sun, uranus conj. pluto, neptune sextile pluto, venus trine pluto, mars opposite pluto and moon trine pluto.
Yeah. I’ve got it bad.
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Very interesting, Neith.
Donna believes those of us with powerful Pluto signatures in our charts can heal ourselves What about the poor others who don’t? ;)
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I meant to put your phrase into italic. Why do I always mess up my messages here? lol
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Hey Togi,
I don’t have his time of birth but from what I can tell, we have pluto conj. pluto, pluto conj. sun, uranus conj. pluto, neptune sextile pluto, venus trine pluto, mars opposite pluto and moon trine pluto.
Yeah. I’ve got it bad.
You can probably ignore the aspects between Pluto and the other outer planets because those are the same for everyone in your generation but Pluto aspecting Sun, Moon, Venus & Mars?! Yup, those are very powerful all right!
If you have a strong Pluto signature in your chart, it’s just that much easier to fall into obsessive patterns. I recommend getting a copy of Donna Cunningham’s book, “Healing Pluto Problems” [see the link on the sidebar] and see if any of her collection of remedies will work for you.
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Hey DM!!
Donna believes those of us with powerful Pluto signatures in our charts can heal ourselves What about the poor others who don’t? ;)
Usually those who don’t have planets in Scorpio, Pluto aspects to personal planets or a loaded 8th house [Plutonian signatures] aren’t bothered by obsessive behaviors as badly. Well, maybe if they get involved with someone where Pluto figures strongly in the synastry but usually Pluto types are drawn to others of their own kind. Hey look at all of them that have dropped by here and at my blogs!! :-)
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Pluto sextile ascendent in Scorpio
Sun Conjunct Pluto at 0.07 degrees
Moon trine Pluto
Uranus conjunct Pluto
I think I am about as Pluto as they come. Thanks for the advice. The death/rebirth thing is exhausting me.
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I recently met this guy that I’m feeling kinda obsessed with. He says he’s seen me before but I don’t remember him. (My venus in leo is exactly conjunct his south node to 0 degrees – I heard this means we were lovers in a past life). I didn’t notice him right off the bat but he kinda grew on me because he’s been trying so hard to get me and now I’m getting kinda obsessed with him too. His venus in scorpio is exactly conjunct my pluto to 0 degrees, and trine my sun (Cancer) and Moon (Cancer). His Jupiter (Cancer) is also conjunct my moon. I’m not sure if it’s just obsession or if there’s something more to it – like soulmates. We see each other in the most random places and he says he can almost read my mind. What do you think?
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Great article. I am a very plutonian individual. i have moon, jupiter, and pluto in scorpio. pluto conjunct the IC. and 6 luminaries in capricorn(mercury, venus, mars, uranus, neptune, sun) all conjunct in the 5th house and saturn conjunct the DC in aquarius. obviously with all this info sharing, im a virgo rising 1* anyways, my boyfriend and i have some strong pluto aspects
pluto conj. moon
pluto sext. venus
pluto sext. mars
pluto sq. moon
pluto opp. jupiter
pluto sext. MC
also…
my pluto in his 7th house
my moon in his 7th house
his moon in my 7th conjunct my saturn
and if you wanna talk midpoints…
his mars/pluto= my sun
his mercury/pluto= my sun
his saturn/pluto= my mercury
his uranus/pluto= my mercury
his pluto/north node= my mars
his pluto/ascendant= my jupiter
his venus/pluto= my saturn
his pluto/north node= my saturn
his venus/AC= my pluto
his moon/jupiter= my pluto
his AC/north node= my pluto
his mars/pluto= my north node
his Mercury/Pluto= my AC
his venus/pluto= my MC
And thats only his midpoints. there are more of mine involving pluto!
BUT OUR RELATIONSHIP IS WONDERFUL, PASSIONATE, TRANSFORMATIVE, REALISTIC, AND DURABLE. WOOHOO!
thanks.
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